Misdirections

I can tell you how to get there
Easy-peasy lemon greasy.
It's simple, really.
You see where I'm pointing?
Just follow my hand thataway
no more than seven minutes,
then take a dog-leg turn
to the left. You'll find two
cats sitting beneath an old willow tree
who look like they're deep in conversation.
One of them is a sweet puss,
and the other will scratch you up,
but I can never remember which is which.
Go around the tree and exit
the first street you see.
Or maybe it's the second?
I only usually come out at night.
Isn't it funny how different
everything looks in the day?
Ha ha, honestly, it's no bother,
from the tree you go three rights
and two lefts, past a tower
with a smug expression,
and then do the reverse southwards.
You'll be feeling a moment of distant
sadness then, but that's good,
because it'll mean you have the cemetery
wall to your right. Put that behind you
and try not to think about the friends
you haven't seen in a long time.

Misdirections

Go down the cobbles that echo
out of step with your feet –
almost there, you still following?
Oh, don't talk to the old guy
who sits on the street smiling and
absolutely don't eat anything he offers.
Yeah, he's a real local character.
Harmless, really, but don't make eye
contact with him. From there it's simple,
honestly. Just keep hold of an early memory
and march forwards. Go straight ahead
as the sun goes down
and you'll be there in no time.