• Vol. 02
  • Chapter 09
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Last Summer

It is summer. We sit on the school field talking about nothing in particular. The only thing I can remember as fact is that we mocked Community Support Officer for not being 'proper policemen. I can't remember if it was after school or if it was just a quiet afternoon, either way I didn't care. I didn't usually enjoy the sun but when you are with friends, you have booze and the sun is out you can really enjoy anything.

It was my turn to take a swing from the bottle. As I did I remembered that not so long ago you asked me out. I suppose you were attractive, but given what we know many years later (Your constant surfer girl style and my love of musicals) it wouldn't have worked, or perhaps it would have, you were always better at toning it down.

As I gulped, I laughed. The red liquid ejected out my nose and fell on my white hoodie turning it pink. You laugh and our friend laughs, I laugh too though I'm more worried about not being able to get the stains out. As I looked down at the stain I am gripped by a sudden wave of panic. I do not want this moment to pass, I didn't want to live without this field, without the sun, without you. I don't want the feeling of acceptance and belonging that being with your friends who by some miracle became my friends too, to vanish.

We started to talk about University. I dreaded the thought. I remember when I was smaller, sitting in my classroom reading an atlas and thinking that being able to point out Bratislava on a map of Europe would get you somewhere, the other kids were out playing football. I was small, I didn't know the rules yet. I wondered if that could happen again.


Last Summer

You're talking about it more excitedly now and you're both getting giddy about all the new people you'll meet and how awesome Fresher's week will be and I slowly grow paler and sicker and begin to look for a way out. You stop talking and turn to me and tell me that I'll be all right and that we'll always be friends since, and I quote 'We have mobile phones.' I smile only half believing what you say, yet knowing I have to get ready for the time summer ends. You put your hand on mine.

I smile back at you but I'm not convinced by it.