I Say All This And Other Things

I slip the cassette into your coffin, feet end. My father has already scattered diamond rings across your chest and now he is weeping dramatically in the corner. The aunts are bringing him sweet things and bending to murmur in his ear as if he is a child.

I can’t find you in my body. My chest is all electricity and heat, like a domino of pylons fell across the English countryside and set the dry wheat alight for miles. You are not there and I can’t find you in my belly either which is a vast cave where the wind has dragged in crisp packets. I say all this on the tape and other things and imagine you smiling.