“Come in, Houston”

“Come in, Houston.”
“What’s with the Houston all of a sudden?
“What? Who is this?”
“You don’t recognise your own mother?”
“MOTHER? Did you say MOTHER?
“You should wash out your ears, Alan. Yes, of course it’s your mother.”
“I told you never to phone me at work.”
“You left your scarf. It’s terribly cold. You’ll catch your death.”
“My SCARF! Did you say ‘my scarf’?”
“Stop repeating everything I say, Alan. Yes, the lovely green woolly one I knitted for you. Is this all the thanks I get?”
“Jesus, mother!”
“And wash your mouth out too, my boy!”
“I’m really busy right now. Please get off the line, Mother.”
“Where are you anyway? You sound funny. Are you gargling? You should be wearing a scarf.”
“We’ll talk about it later.”
“Well, don’t be late home. I’m cooking your favourite.”
“I may be a little late.”
“And pick up some bagels from Frankie’s on your way.”