• Vol. 01
  • Chapter 10

Black Tattoos

Tap's on. Can't be bothered to turn it off. My rebellion against you. A tiny one, but add them all up and they have clout. Kids screaming outside, running riot. My turn. No my turn on the bleeding bike. Make them stop. They make me want to screech as you do, you did. Want to be sick. This thing inside me's growing too quick. I want it out, out out and then I'll throw it away like you threw us away. I hate you, I hate you. I'm telling Mum. No don't come in. Don't you dare come in, Keely. And don't you dare come back. There's a peace in here. It's in the aqua blue you left on the walls. I could swim in it, like I could swim in you. Those were the days, and these are the days I have before me. I'll take a pen and mark them off, each strike in black, tattooing the skin of this room. Water rushes out with all the hate I have in me. It's scalding hot, like the sand on the beach you took me to in June 2011. Hottest day of the year. Running through the sand, crystals blistering our feet. Well it felt like that. Rain keeps falling. Not raindrops, not like the song turning rain into sun. That doesn't happen does it? Not in a million years. Door slams, walls shakes. Mum? Mum? Mum! Banging on the door. Sam called me an ugly cow. Handle turns. Twists. That god awful squeaking noise that you promised you'd fix. I want to twist around and shout. Get out, will you? Steam smudges the mirror, fills the room. Let it be smoke. I'll breathe it in, like all the fags I've stashed away. Bet the smoke would kill me before the fags. Mum, please. Why does she have to cry. She knows how to turn it on. You did too. See, there's proof she's yours. All your accusations come to nought. But you won't come back, will you now.