A Modern Interview

"Are those glasses real?"
"What do you mean, 'real'?"
"You know, like, are they lenses?"
"Yes."
"..."
"Why wouldn't they be?"
"Because other people wear them without lenses."
"Do they?"
"Are they Dior?"
"No."
"Where did you get them from?"
"The thrift store."
"Really? Cool! Where's that?"
"Not really, I got them from Hank's Opticians."
"Oh. I like your dressing gown. It's very 'now'."
"It's a jacket."
"I see. Sorry. I can't see below your waist."
"Probably a good thing."
"What's that?"
"A pitchfork."
"Oh cute! Do you work on the city farm? I heard they do a great vegan breakfast."
"No, I have my own small holding."
"Like an allotment? That's so sweet. I've always wanted one of those. I like your dungarees."
"Thanks. I have seven pairs of these."
"Are they different colours?"
"No."

A Modern Interview

"Who is this?"
"This is my wife."
"Does she speak?"
"Yes."
"Will she speak to me?"
"No."
"I like her brooch."
"She likes her brooch."
"Can I have it. It'd go really well with my rockabilly outfit."
"No."
"I like her dress. It's so vintage."
"We have to go now."
"Ok, no problem. It was lovely meeting you."
"I wish I could say the same."