As A Child

As a child, I hid in a cardboard house with my stuffed animals; we talked for hours and no one heard.

As a child, I practiced cartwheels that crumpled in the grass; cool sharp blades prickled sweaty skin.

As a child, I put on makeup and tried to be pretty.

As a child, I pretended to do everything right; if I was perfect no one would ever be angry.

As a child, I pressed the pedals of my bicycle against the hot wind – escape!

As a child, I watched long-haired boys jump into the lake next to our 'No Trespassing' sign – breaking the rules.

As a child, I daydreamed of waking up in a different body and starting all over again; I would do better this time, I promised.

As a child, I watched the sun set from my grandmother’s picture window; “red sky at night, sailor’s delight.”

As a child, all I needed was my best friend; why did she need anyone but me?

As a child, I craved the wrath of a thunderstorm; to watch the sky, safe inside.

As a child, I didn’t wish for a brother or sister; I didn’t know anything different from alone.

As a child, I wanted most of all to be an adult; adults didn’t need permission.

As a child, I didn’t know the hardest permission to get would be my own.