Tailor Made

Dad What on earth do you call that?

Valda Headgear… It’s a ‘fascinator’ — the latest fashion.

Dad Yes, I know what ‘fascinators are, Valda. I could think of a lot of things to call it, but ‘fascinator’ wouldn’t be one of them. You’re not really intending to go in it, are you?

Valda Oh yes — the thing is — I want to make an impact.

Dad (After a pause) I see. Put it on, then, petal.

She does so. It comes down over her eyes

Dad You’ll make an impact all right — falling head over heels downs those steps.

Valda Oh, I hadn’t thought of that.

Dad Evidently.

Valda I could just keep pushing it back.

Dad Not if you’ve got to shake hands with — you know who — could end up being be very embarrassing for you.

Valda (crestfallen) Yes…I suppose you’re right.

Dad Don’t worry, I’ll think of something. Now let me see. (he thinks, looks around his workshop) Got it. Top shelf. Buckram. Not used as much today, but should do the trick in this instance. (He fixes the hat. This time it fits) There you go. At least it’s not covering your eyes.

Tailor Made

Valda Wow, thanks, Dad.

Dad I haven’t done this job for thirty years without knowing a trick or two. I still think you look like a Valkyrie, though. Valda the Viking rides again!

Valda Dad!

Dad Well, in my opinion, it’d be great fancy dress, and you could certainly get away with it on Ladies’ Day at Ascot, but, I ask you, a Garden Party at Buckingham Palace?